Mind the gap - do The Work

I’ve had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened.

~ Mark Twain

I’m highly creative, sometimes to my detriment. 

Although I’ve channeled my inherent lack of trust to advocate for change in healthcare, unhealthy skepticism has occasionally plagued me in relationships.    

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I have created more troubles in my mind than in reality. 

What is not clear to me yet is when to trust my intuition and when to recognize self-sabotaging behaviour.

In the past, working hard not to attack character, I could quickly become suspicious and inquisitive, expressing the random thoughts running through my head. 

That would invariably lead to defensive reactions from some, draining all energy and causing unnecessary suffering.

Pausing between trigger and reaction

Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.

~ Viktor Frankl

In my effort to be more mindful, I have become better at minding the gap between trigger and response. 

I pause before reacting, at times twenty-four hours or more, to allow time for processing.

Occasionally, I take the time to do The Work, as taught by Byron Katie.

The Work is a self-inquiry technique developed to investigate and question the thoughts and beliefs that lead to suffering. 

It involves identifying a troubling thought, asking four questions, and turning the thought around to its opposite to gain new perspectives. The four questions are:

1. Is it true?

2. Can I absolutely know that it’s true?

3. How do I react when I believe that thought?

4. Who would I be without the thought?

By asking these questions and reflecting on why the thought or belief has arisen, I gain a deeper understanding and find peace and freedom from suffering. 

The Work has been used by millions of people to overcome self-limiting thoughts and beliefs and to find inner peace.

I have linked instructions on how to do The Work here and above.