I made a mistake

We learn from failure, not from success!

~ Bram Stoker

Whenever our two-year-old granddaughter spills something or makes a mess, she looks at us and says, I made a mistake.

She does not say, Oh, clumsy me! or  I’m such a klutz!

A mistake labels a behaviour - a failed attempt. It does not attack character. It can be fixed.

I made a mistake in my last blog when I referred to myself as a non-visible minority.

While the context in which I used these words helped clarify why a person would let down their guard in my presence, when such language becomes part of who I say I am, I am more likely to feel like an outlier and fail to connect with others.

Unspoken expectations are premeditated resentments.

~Neil Strauss

We are all unique in some way. Expecting special treatment for identifying as a minority can lead to resentment.

Resentment can do more damage to the vessel in which it is stored, than to that upon which it is poured (a version of Mark Twain’s quote)

With a growth mindset, failing becomes an opportunity to learn. We admit when we have made a mistake, learn from it, and do not chastise ourselves for it.